Back to

Dear Flushable Toilets

Dear Flushable Toilets,
You suck for people and the environment.
You are so pointless.

Reasons Why Flushable Toilets Suck:

1. You sit, not squat.
Sitting on the toilet is not preferable for the easy flow of “solid waste.” Also, this unnatural sitting while “doing your thing” can cause colon cancer.

2. You waste water while flushing.
Self explanatory

3. You break the nutrient cycle.
No natural “fertilizer” is bad for the environment and is expensive because we have to make up for it in artificial fertilizer.

4. Causes pollution.
Do you know where your “waste” ends up? I don’t.

Now you may be wondering, are compost toilets better?
Yes… Yes they are.

For those unfamiliar (cause I was before this trip), compost toilets are toilets that use no water and the “waste” is collected to fertilize crops.

Reasons Why Compost Toilets Rock:

1. Squatting is better for “doing business.”
2. No water is required. Water is actually bad for these type of toilets. It can cause them to smell really bad.
3. Complete nutrient cycle.
These toilets allow “nutrients” to return to the soil, meaning that there is no need for artificial fertilizer and keeps the soil fertile for longer.
4. No pollution
I know where my “stuff” ends up and I know that I am not causing pollution.

So basically, if you’re not already convinced, you will need to take my word for it, because I have actually used them.

Compost toilets are the king of “waste collectors.”